My “Coming-Out” story.
For those of you who don’t know, I’m a lesbian. Im 52 and I’m a LIFE-LONG female homosexual, who is exclusively attracted to women. Who has ALWAYS been a lesbian. And who ALWAYS will be a lesbian.
I have always been gender non-conforming and was described as a “tomboy” from being very small.
I was dragged out of the closet when I was 17 years old, in the 1980s, when my Catholic parents found love-letters from a woman, that I had hidden in my room, who I had been seeing.
I confessed to “lesbianism” and my confession to this crime, led them to make tentative arrangements, for me too marry a male friend of theirs, who was in his late thirties. This was an attempt to force “compulsory heterosexuality” upon me. Compulsory heterosexuality leads to corrective rape for lesbians.
I could not have married him. I was a LESBIAN. I knew this from being about nine years old. Lesbians DON’T have choices in these matters, were NOT bisexual, as in able to find BOTH sexes, sexually alluring.
I lived at home. I had nowhere to go at that age, apart from live with my homophobic parents. I was still a child in law.
My confession to lesbianism, also led to months of constant emotional, psychological and physical violence from my parents, as punishment for being “dirty” and in a bid to beat me/frighten me, straight.
This abuse was so extreme, that it led me to try to kill myself, aged 17. Because I was a lesbian and because I had brought great shame on my family.
I was sent to a psychiatrist, because I was a lesbian and I was placed on psychiatric medication. For my lesbianism. I was still only 17 years of age. I was still a child.
My suicide attempt and the prospect of being married to a man twice my age, as a lesbian, meant that I had to RUN for my life.
At 18 ish, I navigated my way to Switzerland and went to stay with a cousin of mine who was married and lived out there. That was in 1988. The summer of, emancipation and love, for me.
My cousin and her family were not homophobic. She was safe to be with. Switzerland was also very liberal and tolerant of lesbians and gays, so it was a safe country to abscond too, as a lesbian.
That’s when my good-life started. Life on my terms. Life as a lesbian. I went out on the Swiss-German gay-scene and soon met my first proper girlfriend. We fell in love.
I was 21 when I came back to the UK. Healed and confident about expressing my sexuality and went to live independently from my parents.
It meant being homeless, in Leeds, for a short span, but my craving to be authentic, meant that I really didn’t have a choice. Yes. I was homeless because of my sexuality.
So, that was my “coming-out” story.
Since then, I have had two long-standing loving, lesbian relationships, spanning twenty years, where two children were born. One a girl and one a boy. I didn’t give birth to them and my two lesbian partners, had them using Artificial Insemination by Donor. I was their co-parent. Their… Issy!
I’ve had to really, really fight to exist as a lesbian, but it’s been worth it! My life has been authentic and emotionally fulfilling.
I couldn’t have lived any other way.
LESBIANS DESPERATELY NEED …THE LGB ALLIANCE UK.
Since 2014, organisations and powerful lobbying groups set up for LGBT people, such as Stonewall UK, LGBT umbrella organisations, GLAAD and LGBT Pride events et al, have increasingly neglected LGB needs, causes and interests. They have, during this time, increasingly served and promoted Trans Rights and transgenderism, at the expense of and instead of Lesbian, Gay, and Bisexual Rights.
LGB are sexual orientations, whilst Trans is not a sexual orientation and is focused upon gender and gender identities. (Sex stereotypes).
In 2014, these groups started leaving the LGB community out in the cold and this has escalated over the years to what we have today. A voiceless, toothless and diminished LGB community and a flourishing, thriving and prosperous Trans community.
Lesbians in particular have fared very badly, due to having less power in society because of our sex and issues of sexism and our sexuality.
Lesbians are same sex attracted and female homosexuals. We are therefore exclusively attracted to women. Lesbians do not however base their sexual attraction on gender, because this is not based in material reality or innate.
Stonewall UK et al, in their promotion of Trans rights, seek to enforce “inclusivity” upon them, which would translate into forcing them to consider sexual relationships with ALL genders and sexualities and excluding no one from their dating-pools. To Lesbians and Gays, this would translate into the loss of their exclusive sexuality of being same-sex attracted. It is therefore impossible for them to achieve, as one’s sexuality is innate. It is also unapologetically homophobic and lesophobic. It would render being lesbian and gay obsolete and require that they become bisexual. This is conversion therapy and is illegal in many countries.
As a result, lesbians in particular are being targeted and vilified and demonised by the LGBT community, because we are same-sex (not gender) attracted and are exclusive of men, even if they choose to identify as women based on their gender. As a result lesbians have been labelled “transphobic bigots” and Trans-exclusionary Radical Feminists (Terfs) and been shunned and turned into social pariahs by Trans Rights Activists. Transgenderism is therefore diametrically opposed to LGB rights and is a homophobic ideology.
Stonewall UK et al, who have huge influence and power, provide “education” in many, if not all of our major institutions, including the police service, the NHS, the Criminal Justice System, prisons, schools colleges and universities and by other service providers in the private sector. This input has become extremely biased towards the Trans community, Trans rights and teaches transgender ideology is more important a persons innate sexuality, presenting gender as more important than sexuality. This is funding led.
Stonewall UK have also come u set attack for their promotion that anyone who identifies as a woman is a woman, regardless of their biology and therefore “some lesbians have penises”.
The “trans women are women” trope promoted by this leading LGBT advocacy group has undermined and tried to erode lesbian’s sexual boundaries and allowed, if not encouraged, Trans Identified Males (trans women), to try to coerce lesbians into accepting them as sexual partners, because these trans women, identify as lesbian women! The majority of trans women , are in fact heterosexual men, with a fetish for lesbians, yet they are being championed by Stonewall UK! They are trying to expand the bandwidth of womanhood. Any criticism of this has been met with accusations of “transphobia” by Stonewall UK and backed up by Pink News and the Guardian newspaper. This, of course has angered lesbians
In 2012 Planned Parenthood ran a conference called “Pleasure and Possibilities, which included a workshop on “Overcoming the cotton ceiling:Breaking Down Sexual Barriers For Queer Trans Women”. The term, “cotton ceiling”, is euphemistically used to describe the concerted efforts and practice of trans women trying to get beyond the underwear of lesbians. They employ coercive and gaslighting techniques and refer to their penises as “ladydicks” and “clits on sticks”, as a way to try to distance themselves from their maleness and the fact that based in material reality, they are still and always will be men. This is reprehensible and entirely shameful. It also lends itself to corrective rape, a weapon used by men to “fix” lesbians of their sexuality and a form of conversion therapy.
Stonewall UK have a lot to answer for and are a major component in the literal sexual harassment of lesbians, as they have not sought to challenge this behaviour, or indeed told trans women that what they are doing is immoral, homophobic and wrong. Instead they have lead everyone to blame the lesbians for their “transphobia” and not supported lesbians and their sexuality, which is naturally exclusive.
Gay men have not had pressure heaped upon them by the LGBT community to have sexual relations with trans men, neither have they been labelled “transphobic bigots” or TERFs, or been shunned and treated like social pariahs for being exclusive in their homosexuality. Gay men have not been systematically targeted by trans men either in concerted efforts to validate trans men’s gender identity.
Heterosexual men have also not been pressurised or coerced into being receptive to the sexual advances of trans women, or suffer the consequences of being shunned and cast out of their communities, for their exclusive opposite -sex attraction to women.
What has been happening to lesbians amounts to at the very least sexual harassment and a high probability of violations in their Human Rights, to be exclusively attracted to the same-sex, without interference, molestation, threats or intimidation by the LGBT community and trans women , with the blessing of Stonewall UK, Pink News and people who consider this to be progressive.
Stonewall UK today, are now, some 6 years later, fixated on promoting Trans rights and transgender ideology. As a result of this, they are extremely biased against Lesbians, because of their exclusive sexuality and refusal to accept that “some lesbians have penises”. This AThey are in fact homophobic and dangerous, in particular to lesbians, who cannot accept sexual inclusivity, because it is at odds with their innate sexual orientation, of being same sex attracted.
I’m a life-long lesbian and I came out aged 17 in the 1980s. I am an activist both online and in real life. I spent the summer of 2019, protesting a number of LGBT Pride events, with other lesbians and allies, from the national feminist group, ReSisters UK. These protests were to expose the treatment lesbians were experiencing because of being same-sex attracted at the hands of the LGBT community, with the knowledge and blessing from Stonewall UK and the progressive “woke” left.
We were protesting against LGBT alliances, Stonewall UK and the Pride events themselves which were becoming more hostile towards lesbians as they were becoming increasingly immersed in transgender ideology.
We protested for better lesbian visibility, against lesbian erasure and to raise awareness, that as lesbians, we were ONLY same- SEX attracted and NOT attracted to those who’s gender was identified as female. We protested that we were “Lesbian Not Queer” and that “Lesbians Don’t Have Penises”.
At these Pride events, our peaceful protests, were met with absolute contempt, aggression and hatred, by people that had attended the Pride events and in the main, these were trans allies, heterosexuals, who had taken to calling themselves “Queers”, in order to be considered “transgender” themselves and fit in with the narrative!
We were spat at, had our placards torn and were faced with baying mobs of Trans Rights Activists. They were full of hatred for us daring to assert ourselves and our sexual boundaries, that were being eroded by Stonewall, Trans Identified Males, Trans Rights Activists and the progressive “woke” left.
At the Lancaster Pride event, the 5 of use who were protesting, by an angry mob and were deliberately swamped by trans allies and Trans Rights Activists and obscured from being seen by trans flags. The police did nothing to keep these angry silencers away from us and we were forced to stop our peaceful protest, because of prolonged verbal abuse and the the intimidation by the sheer numbers of very hateful trans allies. We were surrounded by a sea of trans flags and a hysterical, hateful, “Trans Women Are Women” mantra chanting mob. The police had to escort us away, for our own safety. The organisers allowed and encouraged our peaceful protest to be terminated, drowned out and silenced at an LBGT Pride event, by trans allies, the majority of whom were heterosexual.
They were horrific experiences to witness and deal with and I won’t ever forget them.
Every LGBT Pride that we protested, we were shut-down and intimidated into silence by trans people, gay men, trans allies, Trans Rights Activists and even the organisers themselves. We had proved our point, that lesbians were not welcome, in this increasingly obvious men’s sexual rights movement.
At Lancaster Pride 2019, which was advertised as a family event, evidence of this men’s sexual rights movement were seen in terms of men parading around in fetish clothing and animal masks.
It was extremely disturbing to see a tent that had been set up for small children, as a “play” area, which was run by adult men wearing fetish clothing and animal masks calling themselves “Pups”. Children had been left there, unsupervised, by their parents, who considered it appropriate and suitable child-care. They obviously had very little knowledge about protecting their children from sexual abuse, or from grooming. Safeguarding concerns were reported to the police. They took no action. I took a photograph of this highly inappropriate set-up, which you can view below.
When Trans attached themselves to the LGB organisations, it became increasingly obvious that they came with a Trojan horse, of fetishists and kinksters, who were overwhelmingly heterosexual men. This is not what LGB stood for and not what Pride was supposed to represent. This fetishism and public displays of male paraphilias was nothing to do with sexual orientations or LGB civil rights. Our movement has been hijacked.
Over the last few years, these heterosexual, gay and bi men, with fetishes, have attended public LGBT Pride events, that are being promoted as family friendly, in fetish, BDSM clothing and wearing animal masks. This is not appropriate, but has been encouraged by the “sex positive” Trans contingent of the LGBT alliances and welcomed by organisers. In the photograph below children witness this kink at a “family friendly” LGBT Pride event, whether they want to consent to, it or not.
As well as being anti -Lesbian, these Pride events have increasingly become a public display of men’s sexual paraphilias and kink. This is being forced onto the LGB community, whether we like it or not.
Also hiding in the shadows of this Trojan horse, are the paedophiles, who have rebranded, calling themselves, Minor Attracted Persons (MAPs). They are already becoming accepted on social media by Twitter and I guarantee that they will be shuffling forward and they will start to assert themselves at LGBT Pride events in the UK. This is all evidence that Pride is becoming part of a men’s sexual rights movement , which is encouraged by Transgender ideology, “sex positivity” and transgenderism.
Radical Lesbian Feminists in particular, want absolutely nothing to do with this scene and what LGBT Pride has become and what it now represents. It is misogynistic and corrupting of the young and impressionable and is normalising of BDSM, kink and men’s fetishism.
Its certainly not a safe, or an appropriate environment for young people to be involved in. It is not about Lesbian, Gay or Bisexual civil rights anymore, it has been hijacked by men, straight, bi and gay and trans-formed into an expression of men’s sexual rights.
LGB Alliance UK, formed last year as a result of a LGB community in crisis, in the face of homophobic Transgenderism and Stonewall UKs inability and unwillingness to support or promote this community.
It is lesbian led and promises to give lesbians a prominent voice on policy making and implementation. They have been true to their word and I know lesbians that are involved in setting it up.
I have been advertising it, promoting it on social media, recruiting for it and encouraging my followers on Twitter and Facebook, to donate money, because lesbians in particular are desperate for a voice, support and a robust organisation to champion their needs, as no other exists.
Courts of criminal law in the UK, are excusing men, or reducing their sentences, by blaming deceased women for demanding “rough sex” and BDSM sex games. 59 women in the UK have died, with dangerous sex being used by the male defendants as an excuse.
Books such as 50 Shades of Grey, Bondage Domination Sadism and Masochism (BDSM), and the pornography industry, have opened the floodgates to a tide of misogynistic, sexual abuse and dangerous sexual practices against women.
BDSM is extreme and brutal and goes way beyond “light bondage’ or “slap and tickle”. It glamourises and promotes sadistic violent sex such as; beating, suffocation, hanging, burning, drowning, rape, cutting, whipping, suspension, torture, strangulation, choking, bestiality, violent sex with visibly pregnant women, gang-rape and a myriad of other violent sexual practices, designed for humiliation, domination and submission of the masochist, at the hands of the sadist.
Supporters and practitioners of BDSM claim that consent has to be given, but do women really give consent to be murdered through violent sex? I think not. No woman would consent to their own murder.
These men are victim “blaming and shaming” their partners. They claim explicit “consent” was given by the woman for “rough sex” and that the sex (not him), went “too far”. The women are dead, so they cannot deny this.
What type of man would agree to commit acts of violence and strangulation against a woman sexually? A sadistic misogynist, an abuser, that’s what type of man.
A none-abusive man would refuse to participate in these practices, if in fact they indeed were requested by a masochistic woman, in the first place. If it were the case that these women had requested such dangerous sex, every one of them could have refused they could have said “No”. These men attempt to portray themselves as the victims, which is a classic abuser trick.
I think that BDSM, misogyny and domestic violence are inextricably linked. Many of the men prosecuted, had domestic violence and abuse levelled at them prior to murder. Some were even convicted of domestic violence offences, against their victim.
How many men have died as a result of women killing them with these types of dangerous sexual practices. That’s right, none.
Dangerous sex has now become culturally mainstream in the UK. This is in part due to the pornography industry normalising it and therefore desensitising the adults and children who watch it. The demand for such pornography is huge.
Heterosexual and bisexual women in the UK report increasingly, that they have been asked to and are expected to participate and consent to practices such as choking, (a domestic violence Red Flag), anal sex, spitting and “spanking” (assault by beating), as part of “normal” sex, by their male partners.
Children are also watching pornography, either accidentally or deliberately on their devises. The boys are learning to brutalise women sexually and the girls to be passive and submissive to such requests for dangerous sexual practices.
Teen Vogue recently published an article targeted at young teen-age girls on “Breath Play” (strangulation) and how to do it safely. A recent article featured anal sex.
Girls are being taught, therefore, to ignore the Red Flags to sexual abuse and domestic violence.
Dangerous sex includes many BDSM practices, so called “rough sex”, strangulation, anal sex and beating. It is promoted by the pornography industry and it serves men. Women and children are the victims of these increasing sexual abuses.
Dangerous sex and how it impacts its victims, needs more mainstream recognition and challenges made of it, rather than blind acceptance, or attempts to ignore it. It is proliferating, not going away.
The multi-million pound pornography industry needs serious regulation. Pornography also needs recognisingas highly addictive and a serious risk to public health. It needed addressing in mainstream politics.
And men. Men need to check their levels of deviancy if they find dangerous sex arousing, their disrespectful attitudes towards women, decency and expectations of women.
Sex, dangerous or otherwise, is not a human right.
One of the biggest red flags in domestic abuse has been identified as strangulation and in Great Britain, 2.2 women a week are killed by their male partners or ex-partners.
“Breath play” was only used and depicted, until quite recently, within the auspices of Bondage Domination Sadism and Masochism (BDSM). BDSM sex is misogynistic, is violent, extreme and hardcore. It is now however, normalised and promoted by the pornography industry and has been down-graded to a “mainstream” sexual practice.
Even magazines such as Teen Vogue have featured an article on it and how to do it “safely”. This magazine is for teenage girls.
Many men and boys regularly watch pornography and pornography per se, has become a billion pound industry. It has never been as easy to access as it is today. Pornography exists in supply and demand economic tradition. If it wasn’t demanded, the supply would dry up. Unfortunately the demand for it it very high. It corrupts all those who view it, appear in it or produce it.
Young boys are accessing pornography (either deliberately or accidentally) through the internet and it is easily accessed by them in just a few clicks on their devices. Boys are therefore being taught these “techniques” which have been normalised, by watching them and learning from them. For many boys, the only sex education they receive is by the pornography industry and they do not have any input to balance this corruption, such as education around healthy relationships or intimacy. Pornography teaches young males how to sexually abuse women and girls.
Girls are being taught that “Breath play” is acceptable and a common sexual practice. They are being taught and groomed to be submissive and passive to it and not being taught that it is dangerous or a red-flag for more violent behaviours from men and boys.
Strangulation is increasingly understood to be a precursor to more violent offences against women and ultimately murder, say many professionals, who work in the area of domestic violence.
An increasing number of domestic murder cases are now attributed to “rough sex” or “Breath play” by the men who kill and this is being used in courts in the UK as a defence for these men. Many of these women are brutalised beyond belief and then strangled. The men often blame the victim for their abusive and murderous behaviour. “She wanted me to!” is often used with increasing success in UK criminal courts to acquit the defendant.
Strangulation takes time and effort and therefore a high degree of sadism on the part of these men. It is not simply lashing out in anger in a moment of pique. Most of the cases that have used “rough sex” as a defence, have featured previous concerns or reports against these men for domestic violence. Yet they are still acquitted.
Choking, strangulation and “breath play” are far from normal and I am very concerned as an ex-sexual offender specialist, for the Probation Service, that this practice is being promoted by the pornography industry and becoming normalised within society. I am also very concerned that young people, especially boys are being trained to think it is an acceptable and normal sexual practice. It is not!
WLRN’s Thistle Pettersen Interviews Lesbian Activist Issy Dickinson – Women’s Liberation Radio News
Issy Dickinson is a Lesbian-Feminist Activist and one of the Organisers of the Lesbian Strength March and Rally that took place in her hometown of Leeds in the UK on September 7th, 2019. Ms. Dickinson is studying for a Masters Degree at the University of Leeds and spoke with Thistle via skype on September 18th about the lead-up to the March and what the March was like on-the-ground the day it happened.
This interview if full of useful information and lively discussion for any budding feminist activists out there who wish to learn how to organize uplifting and positive demonstrations on the streets.
The Lesbian Strength March was born out of months of weekly meetings and planning sessions a handful of creative and dedicated women attended to make sure the marchers and speakers would be safe and have an enjoyable time.
The two main organizations putting the March on were ReSisters and Get the L Out UK. Both had members who had attended Pride events in Lancaster and in Leeds prior to creating their own march, separate from regular Pride.
Please view video coverage of what happened to the lesbian presence at Lancaster Pride in late June of this year linked to below. It is important to understand the prior situation on the streets some of these same demonstrators faced that day in Lancaster in the hands of the transactivists.
Please also view the rally speeches given at the March here.
From the frustration, trauma and demoralizing experiences the pro-lesbian activists had at these two Pride events, fertile soil was cultivated for creating the Lesbian Strength March on September 7th.
What the story of this March shows is that we have the choice to go forward in solidarity and in our sisterhood, or to be demoralized and fearful because transactivism has gotten so ugly and in many cases, the powers-that-be, such as the police, are not on our side.
These Leeds sisters and sisters from across the United Kingdom demonstrated to the world on September 7th that our sisterhood truly can be powerful and our bonds undiminished by transactivist attacks.
Listen to this compelling telling of Issy’s stories of her organizing experiences in a tightly knit group of women and then her glorious moment in the sun with her sisters the day the March happened.
Read on wlrnmedia.wordpress.com/2019/09/21/wlrns-thistle-pettersen-interviews-lesbian-activist-issy-dickinson/amp/
We should all be protecting children from sex-ploitation like this. It’s not entertaining it’s child abuse and made to gratify adults, mainly men.
This is paedoculture, pure and simple. These children are encouraged to dress, move, pose, dance and behave in highly sexualised adult ways, which cater for those of a paedophilic disposition.
Unfortunately, I have come across paedophilic pornography, as a sexual offender/paedophile specialist when I was a Probation Officer. The images here constitute child pornography and pornography is a very broad spectrum of imaging and objectification. These are at the lower end of the scale.
Think about it! Who really finds young children entertaining in these genres? Who benefits from us becoming desensitised to the sexualisation of children in drag or pageants? Paedophiles!
Please object to this exploitation and grooming of children and society to accept this. It’s totally wrong.
Lesbianism is under attack like no time ever in history. We are attacked for being same sex attracted by the heterosexual communities. We are attacked by LGBTQ communities, because we won’t have sex willingly with trans women.
We are also under attack from bisexual women who are already in our community by stealth, claiming lesbianhood on the back of radical feminism and compulsory heterosexuality. This undermines our purity, our culture and our heritage and takes Lesbian spaces away from us.
I have lesbian friends who’s lives and hearts have been broken by these faux-lesbians with counterfeit identities, who then return to men’s beds, or come out with lesophobic platitudes that injure lesbian psyche.
They are desperate to “have sex” with real lesbians, so they can cross it off their bucket-lists and then move-on to their next item on it. They objectify lesbians which is predatory and unhealthy and something that men do to us. This causes untold personal damage to an already marginalised and vulnerable group in society.
Lesbians need allies, but we don’t need allies that try to take over our communities and colonise it by proclaiming they too are “lesbians”, when they are clearly not. It doesn’t work like that.
I know many bisexual women who do not do this to a community they are purporting to support. I respect and admire these women and I am proud to call them “sisters”. They are honest and genuine and not playing identity politics or trying to have a sexual experience to validate their new coveted sexuality. Transwomen try to do this to us also.
Heterosexual women also don’t do this to the lesbian community. Again, I have a lot of time for these women because they don’t have a hidden agenda. I am proud to call them “sisters” also.
Becoming a radical feminist is a political act and a process, but one isn’t compelled to change one’s sexuality too. I think that this is where things have become confused for these women. I think that they feel unless they identify AS “ lesbians”, they won’t be respected because being merely political isn’t enough. This is so far from the truth.
I, for one am devastated and threatened by the dilution of lesbianism recently, by these women, who look down their noses at lesbians and our unique exclusivity to other lesbians.
Bisexual does not mean lesbian and lesbian does not mean bisexual.
I may sound like a militant lesbian separatist, which I do not think is a bad thing under these circumstances. Our community is being attacked and we are at war.
I seek to preserve lesbianism and stop it being attacked, eroded and diluted, both from inside and outside the community.